I am currently in a state of morbid fear about what is gonna happen...like there is a time bomb and I have to save myself or something! I feign indifference when friends or loved ones ask me what the problem is...but heart of hearts, I hate to admit that I am forever worried!

Nowadays, I have the most wierd dreams and I get up in the wrong side of the bed on most mornings! Life itself is wierd sometimes....am sorry about this woeful post but i need a vent...and am not comfortable talking about it to anyone either. Wish I had a magic wand or something, and I could brush away all the unwanted thoughts and things in my life. I guess that's why I like these 'ugly duckling turns swan' and 'rags to riches' movies.

I have my good moments too....i guess that is what keeps me going... it could be a thoughtful gesture from S or a long chat with amma or a kind word from a friend...or even to see the plants flowering in my teeny weeny garden! :) Life is one big puzzle...who knows what happiness lies hidden somewhere??!! I just need the patience, intelligence and positivity to wait for it to unravel itself....