Continuing this , I have often come across people who make a generalized statement like 'Oh, Women always gossip' or for that matter ' Men are such chauvinists'. It gets my goat when you judge someone based on their gender or which part of the country they are from! I strongly believe that an individual is an individual. PERIOD. Irrespective of whether you are a male or a female, your personality, beliefs and attributes are strongly influenced by your upbringing and the surroundings you have grown up...
You don't have to be a woman to gossip or a man to be chauvinistic! A few years back, it would have been really easy to provoke me with such gender-specific statements. I would get into a huge argument with the said person. Over time, I have realized that there is no point. Is there anyone who likes to be proved wrong, including me? No! So I have become mature enough to understand there is no point trying to convince someone otherwise and choose to keep quiet. Saves a lot of trouble for both of us, right? However, if I know the other person well enough, I will try to have a healthy discussion, at least get to know why s/he feels that way.
Having said that, I have also understood that it is important to listen, not hear someone when they speak. Often, I am so excited about what I want to say that I never LISTEN. I have to change this trait of mine!
For a long time, I also thought that its so boring to be quiet and found quiet people boring! I am a woman of words; in fact too many words. I have realized it would take a lot of effort to restrain yourself from expressing yourself in a fight or heated discussion with someone. Often, When S and I argue, I have learnt to control myself and keep quiet. Its extremely difficult for me, but I do coz I might say something in a fit of anger and regret it for the rest of my life. So I remain silent. It helps A LOT!
When you are calm and take some time to think; it puts a lot of things into perspective. I know my basic nature will not change. But when you stay quiet, you feel calm and serene inside after some time. Another lesson learnt; its not easy to be quiet AND sometimes its good to remain silent :-)
I have a confession to make! I am not too conscious about what others think of me; I mean I don't bog myself down about what people will say or think! That does not mean I don't care at all...I do care about people I love; rather people who mean a lot to me. The buck stops there. I don't want to spend the rest of my life trying to please EVERYONE. It is just not possible. In fact, I have had some people tell me the most vicious things with a ' I say this with no malice' and I can't help but laugh! :D So there is just no point. Such people just don't matter. PERIOD.
I ALWAYS dream, when I am sleeping. Even if I sleep on the way somewhere for like 15 minutes, I dream! Its so wierd...sometimes the most obscure person features in my dream! Nowadays, if I have a bad dream, I try to think about pleasant things. I realize that I want to control my dreams as well...but it does not work...after some time, it goes back to the bad dream!! I have tried praying too but it does not help. Any suggestions here?
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